Fears about my daughter’s spending habits are keeping me up at night

亲爱的迪德: WORRIES about my daughter’s spending habits are keeping me awake.

She was born with learning difficulties so has always been immature.

My daughter never seems to have any money left at the end of the week

My daughter never seems to have any money left at the end of the week

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Now she’s 24, I’m trying to help her to become more independent.

But as her 55-year-old mum, I am very anxious about her finances.

She still lives at home, has a job in a cafe and a boyfriend, who seems like a decent young man.

I don’t charge her for rent or food, so she should have plenty of money to pay for petrol, clothes and going out.

然而, she never seems to have any left at the end of the week and has been asking me for cash.

I don’t know what she’s spending it on.

When I try talking to her about it, she gets angry and defensive.

I’ve even suggested she puts some money in an envelope each month, but she says she can do what she likes with it.

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What can I do?

I’m not sleeping properly, worrying about her future.

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Kelly kisses Amber during their girl's night

迪德的故事

Kelly kisses Amber during their girl’s night

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迪德说: Letting our children become independent means allowing them to make their own mistakes.

Understandably, you’re particularly anxious, given your daughter’s learning difficulties, which make her more vulnerable.

Perhaps you could try talking to her boyfriend, to see if he’s aware of her spending. If he’s a decent guy, he should be willing to help.

Talk to your daughter again. Tell her you want an adult conversation.

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Kelly kisses Amber during their girl's night

迪德的故事

Kelly kisses Amber during their girl’s night

Perhaps you can suggest drawing up a budget together. See my support pack on Family Finances.

For support for people with learning disabilities, contact mencap.org.uk (0808 808 1111).