CHER DEIDRE: APPARENTLY I’m in danger of “letting it all go south”.
Je suis 29, have two kids and my mother-in-law, 65, does everything she can to put me down.
I could cope but my husband, 35, has never stood up for me. He just laughs it off and tells me I’m being sensitive.
I did put on weight during my pregnancies but battled hard to get fit again and am back in my pre-pregnancy clothes.
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When I was overweight, she would warn me to cut out the “junk”, explaining my husband’s eyes would wander.
Puis, when I started losing weight, she would lecture me about becoming “skeletal”.
I can’t win! I think she might be jealous.
She even makes bad jokes about how I’d struggle if I got Covid.
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DEIDRE DIT: You hit the nail on the head when you said you think she may be jealous. Her criticisms speak louder about her own low self-esteem than anything else.
Next time she insults you, tell her calmly that her put downs are unacceptable and you won’t tolerate them any longer. The key is being assertive while staying calm.
Explain to your husband how upset you are and you would appreciate his backing.
I’m sending you my support pack on Standing Up For Yourself which will help you with both conversations.