BEING an air hostess, flying around the world in first-class, sounds like the most glamorous job in the world.
But Love Island star Laura Anderson has revealed that couldn’t be further from the truth.
In 'n eksklusiewe onderhoud met The Sun, Laura, 33, has shared some very raunchy secrets and gross passenger stories from her 10 years as a flight attendant for XL Airlines, Qantas and Emirates.
Sex in the seats
Laura first started training as an air hostess when she was 17, when she worked for the now-bust XL Airlines for a few years, flying out of Glasgow, before going to Qantas, flying from London Heathrow.
She started out working on the short-haul flights to Ibiza on Friday and Saturday nights, which she recalls being “carnage”.
Laura says: “People just wouldn’t sit down, they just want to party from the start.
“I once saw a girl straddling a guy with a blanket over them, while we were landing.
“We were laughing at first, but then I had to tap her on the head under the blanket, soos, ‘Excuse me, you need to sit down in your own seat, I don’t even want to see what you’re doing under there,’ or there’d be people hitting on you.”
Maar, surprisingly, Laura says passengers in the first-class lounge on long-haul flights with Emirates – where she worked for eight years before Liefde-eiland – get up to even more mischief than us Brits.
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Sy sê: “That lounge is carnage and you wouldn’t even think because, with business class, you think people would be really sophisticated.
“But I’ve literally seen people get together in front of me in the lounge.
“I was on a night flight and there was a woman and man who came separately on the flight then left together. They were just literally falling in love in front of my eyes.
“I remember they started snogging right in front of me, and I was like, ‘You can’t be doing that!''
“We’re quite lucky in the UK,” she adds. “People are quite good with their hygiene, quite civilised , but sometimes in certain places, the craziest things would happen.
“It was like people had never been on an aircraft before.”
Cooking fish on plane
Laura remembers one Emirates flight on which a man stood by the door next to her jumpseat, “took his trousers down and went to the toilet”.
Terwyl, on a 14-hour flight to Toronto, “everything went wrong” and someone vomited on her jumpseat due to the turbulence.
But it was on a flight to Indonesia that she witnessed something very strange.
She recalls: “I said to the crew, ‘Are we serving fish? I can smell fish really strongly’. So I was walking down the cabin checking everyone and this woman had a hot plate – no exaggeration – cooking a whole fish.
“I don’t know how she’d got it on the plane, but I was just like, ‘What the hell are you doing? You can’t cook your own food’ and she was like ‘Can you cook it for me?''
We landed and there was s*** all over the mirror, walls and toilet
But that has nothing on the moment Laura landed in Ibiza, after a 10-hour flight from Dubai.
Sy sê: “We went into the toilet and, I’m not even joking, there was s*** all over the mirror, the walls, the toilet.
“We just went in and we were all laughing and crying because we had to clean it up.
“So I can tell you now it’s not glamorous. It’s a lot of getting on your hands and knees and cleaning and stuff like that!”
How to join the Mile High Club
When it comes to the Mile High Club, Laura says there was always some chatter among the crew about First Class passengers going into the shower together.
Sy sê: “It did actually say on the door that two occupants were allowed in the shower spa, so sometimes we’d hear some gossip from First Class about some celeb like, ‘Ag, we saw so and so go in the toilet together, wonder what they’re doing.’”
Maar, Laura says, it’s also easy to get away with it in economy.
“Honestly, I was so busy, so we didn’t really care anyway, we were like, ‘enjoy yourself!’
“It’s no bother for the crew because we’re just like, if it’s not a safety thing, and there’s no dying involved, ons gee nie om nie.
“Everyone thinks the crew are out to get you if you do that, but literally no one cares!”
Drunk and disorderly
But she had to deal with lots of drunk men leering at her in the First Class lounge.
“As a Brit, I was always put on the lounge because they’d be like, ‘You can deal with drunk people, you guys like to drink’.
“These flights were so long that people would get drunk, get sober and get drunk again, and sometimes the guys just wouldn’t leave.
“They’d be standing talking to you, literally spitting peanuts in your face, just because they’re so drunk, leaning over the bar, chatting you up, and you lie to them, and just say you’re not allowed to give them your number.”
‘I stood up a movie star’
Egter, one person’s number she did manage to get was Twilight star Kellan Lutz, and she even ended up standing him up on a date.
“This was always my claim to fame,” Laura says. “Kellan Lutz was a passenger on my LA flight once.
"Ek was soos, ‘O my God, he is absolutely beautiful,’ but I was just acting really cool.
“Then we were just chatting loads on the flight and he gave me his f***ing number.
“I got back to the hotel, we were speaking all night, and we said we were going to meet in Venice Beach the next day.
'Maar, the thing is – and this is so bad – because of the jetlag, I was awake all night and then I fell asleep in the morning and slept the whole day, woke up to all these messages from him like ‘are you not coming?’
“I looked at the clock and it was six o’clock at night!
“He probably had never been stood up before and all my mates were like, ‘You’re a d**k. You could’ve got with Kellan Lutz!''
Kellan isn’t the only celeb who Laura rubbed shoulders with during her time as cabin crew.
Sy sê: “Nothing crazy happened, but I had Channing Tatum on a flight. He just looks like a regular guy and he’s not that tall either.
“I had Example as well. He gave us all tickets to his concert and I didn’t go. I felt really bad. He was lovely.”