父は私を怠け者で失敗者と呼んでいます – 私は彼のフルタイムの介護者ですが、

親愛なるDEIDRE: MY dad calls me a lazy, work-shy failure – even though I’m his full-time carer.

He doesn’t appreciate what I do for him at all, and constantly nags me to get a proper job.

He believes care work is for women, not men

He believes care work is for women, not men

私は 50 そして彼は 78. We lost my mum a few years ago, and since then he has really declined.

He’s lonely and has severe arthritis, and I think he’s also beginning to get dementia.

二年前, I took voluntary redundancy to become his carer.

I do everything for him – the cooking, クリーニング, gardening and shopping, as well as his personal care and admin.

I don’t get a minute for myself.

But he seems to think I should be out there looking for a job.

He believes care work is for women, not men.

When I tell him he won’t manage on his own, he says he will.


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プライベートメッセージを送信することもできます DearDeidreOfficial Facebookのページ.

I don’t need to work. I have lots of savings.

But being put down every day is really getting to me.

DEIDRESAYS: Being a full-time carer is very stressful, even without the added tension caused by your dad’s criticisms.

If you don’t want to get a job, then you must stand up to him.

Maybe he’s worried about the finances and you need to reassure him.

Perhaps you could consider part-time work, which would give you some respite from each other.

サポートのための, contact Carers UK (, 0808 808 7777) and see my support pack Help For Carers.