KATE Ferdinand has opened up on becoming “over emotional” on milestone family moments with her step-children and her “desperation” over “good feedback” from the kids.
His late wife Rebecca Ellison died in 2015 after a short battle with cancer.
Yet, understandably, it is still a tender subject and something which Kate addressed on podcast, Made By Mammas.
She told listeners of the myriad of emotions involved in being a stepmum and quizzed: “Why do we feel that shame? Because we are their stepmum, we work bloody hard, we’re good step parents.
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“I think society makes us feel like a step parent isn’t enough, or isn’t good enough. ‘Oh, you’re not their mum, you’re their stepmum.
“No, I’m their bloody step mum and I do a good job. It’s not actually a bad thing, but sometimes I feel like, ‘Oh God, this is awkward…’”
Talking over annual events such as Mother’s Day, where she has said she feels “guilty”, she continued: “I’m so over emotional around the whole thing. I overthink everything.
“Even on Mother’s Day, they wrote me the most unbelievable card. I was just sobbing.
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“They’re like, ‘Kate, are you OK’.
“I was like ‘I’m just so happy that you wrote this to me!’ They’re like, ‘God, Kate is emotional today’.
“It’s just when they give you that, it just feels… oh it’s so, like, you’re desperate for it.
“This is really weird, God it sounds crazy, but when you hear those words and you’ve worked so hard for so many years, and you love them and you hear… you get that little bit of good feedback, it’s like the best feeling ever.”
She later told of her “panic” at such events, which leave her in an “anxious state” the week beforehand.
Kate continued: “So you can prepare for all of these days, and it just sometimes hits you on a day that you literally don’t expect it at all. So you think you can prepare, but you can’t really.
“You just have to go with the flow and just be there for them. And it just hits you at random times, sometimes.”
After Rebecca died, and before he met Kate, Rio took on the role of being a single parent to his brood.
He was hailed for his honestly in his 2017 documentary Being Mum and Dad.
He spoke about taking on the role of mum after his wife died, he said: “Your appreciation for mothers and how they cope and how they deal with the school run, just doing that… there’s so much more that goes into it that mums do, that many of us men don’t even consider.
“The preparation that goes into it the night before, uniforms, books, breakfasts – and the first time [after] that they had to go to school, and before I knew it they were late.
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“And I did think, what am I going to do?
“It doesn’t matter how much money you’ve got, or if you’re in the public eye or not, I think we all come under the same type of stresses at that point.”