CARO DEIDRE: MY husband and I are newlyweds but we might as well be living in a nunnery.
Siamo stati sposati per 11 months but have only had sex three times during that period.
Lui è 32 e io sono 28, and the reality is we live more like nuns than a couple.
I’m concerned that he never wants to touch me. I fear he must think I’m unattractive.
He says that I put too much pressure on him, which is a turn off for him.
Every night he rolls over and falls asleep. I’m starting to become dependent on my vibrator. I’m not sure what to do next.
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I can predict the next time we will have sex will be on our wedding anniversary and my birthday, and then nothing.
How do I work through this as it’s really getting me down?
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DEIDRE DICE: Your husband could have a lower sex drive than you.
He could be feeling low or stressed, or he could feel there is an issue with your relationship.
The least likely explanation is that he isn’t attracted to you.
You need to talk, but outside the bedroom. Explain how this is making you feel. Ask him what is going on for him.
You may have a higher sex drive, in which case you may both need to compromise.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
I’d recommend seeing a sex and relationship counsellor.
Cosrt.org.uk (020 8543 2707) can help connect you with someone reputable.